Your Career And Your Family … Which One Comes First ?

Image courtesy Sura Nualpradid/

Image courtesy Sura Nualpradid/

He’s fifteen. At that tender age, he has already assumed the huge responsibility of being a mother and a father to three kids. He bathes, feeds, takes care of them and takes them to school. He also teaches them “what he knows.”

Before you begin to wonder if he is an hermaphrodite, let me quickly tell you that this little father-mother is just a house help !!!
This is a real life story and not fiction. Similar stories are found everywhere, except in my home 🙂 There is one bad thing about making money – it makes you forget that there are some things it cannot buy. A child from a very wealthy home once said to me out of frustration, “I have everything, except parental love.” Her parents are never around. They leave very early for work and come back very late at night. Even when they are around, it’s still work-work-work !!! For her, everything she knows comes from outsiders. Mummy or daddy have no time to teach her anything. Fun? That it is a different issue entirely – no outings as a family, no sitting down and watching TV together, no parent-child playing together and no sign of having parents !
Between couples, the inability of  a man or woman to maintain a good balance between work and the family has led to strained relationships/marriages and divorce in extreme cases. Some cases of staying out late into the nights, eating out  and adultery are also traceable to the inability to strike a balance between giving your career the best attention it deserves and at the same time, not making one’s family to be deprived of care, love, and attention. Hey! Where ever we go, we still need to go back home. So, it is compulsory that  in all that we do, the home front has to be given a well-deserved attention.
A man’s regular presence in the house cannot be over emphasised. His presence provides a psychological security for his family, plays a major role in discipline, reduces or eliminates the tendency towards adultery, reduces the tendency for the children to “learn” from outside the family and keeps the family bond strong. It also teaches the male children how to be a good family man in future. This, I learnt from my late dad 🙂 For me, the best thing about closing time at work is that not too long I would be with my family. It is the best place to unwind after a hard day’s work 🙂 Even when I have to go and unwind after work, I go with my lovely family, who would not even spare my phone lines as soon as it is time for me to be at home, and I am not there.
My late mum’s friend’s marriage almost hit the rocks when the lady resigned from the public service for a very lucrative bank job. The huge salary she got replaced the happy family she once had. Having a good time with her family stopped. Cooking for the family stopped. Playing with the children stopped. Having time for her husband stopped. In fact, the female house help “took over” the house. She was lucky the maid did not take over her husband too 🙂 When she noticed that her marriage and family were heading towards a collapse, she had to make a quick and hard decision – her career or her family? She chose her family !!!
Which one would you have chosen? 🙂
Thanks for you time

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Looking For The Best Care Giver For Your Children?

Taking care of children of all ages can really be an uphill task. At home, the child is exposed to all sorts of things that affect him or her both positively and negatively. It’s so difficult and time-consuming that some parents have to employ the services of nannies and care givers to take care of them. Even with this arrangement, there is a limit to what the care givers can do.

As they grow older, they have to go to school and start mixing up with children from other homes. Parents’ and care giver’s job is passed on to the teachers when they are in the school, where they mix up with other children from different family backgrounds. They learn a lot in the process – the good, the bad and the ugly.

Despite all of these care, training and upbringing, we still find a lot of children who exhibit signs of lack of proper upbringing by parents, schools and care givers. Today, we find children from very good homes being unrepentant members of dare-devil gangs, doing hard drugs, involving in rape cases, involving in robberies, involving in nudity and indecent dressing, showing disregard to good grades in school and engaging in other miscellaneous crimes. More interesting is the involvement of children of the “servants of God” in all these anomaly.

In addition to these, children are also exposed to all sorts of health hazards and insecurity. This is often beyond the control of parents and care givers. Are we going to lock them up in the house because of accidents or insecurity outside? Who says that the home is free from hazards and insecurity?

I guess by now you would be anxious to know who this “Mr. Fix It” Care Giver I want to recommend to you is. Relax! I will tell you. “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.”(Isaiah 49:15)…yeahh, God Almighty !!!

For every single day, from the days of his being in his mother’s womb, I have, for close to five years, prayed for and handed over my son to this amazing Care Giver. He neither forgets my kids nor sleeps nor makes mistakes, and therefore has no excuses. He directs my son’s steps and therefore keeps him from danger. He waits for, and deals with every childhood health challenges and therefore keeps him in sound health, year in, year out. Academically, he is called “The Prof.” In all, my son has been in the hands of the best Care Giver that exists.

It is because of this extra ordinary antecedent that I confidently handed over my daughter, who will be nine months old in six days’ time, to this extra ordinary Care Giver, right from when she was in the womb. As expected, it has been great!!! It has been about nine months of amazing grace and mercies of God, who has proved to be a great dad and Care Giver for my kids. What I feel so grateful for is her PERFECT health for almost nine months. At her age, she does things a baby of her age would rarely do. Things that only God can really explain where she learnt them from. Her intelligence is equally divine! Just like in the case of her brother, God has been too protective; too caring and very loving. I call her “The Amazing One !”

God is awesome and I am eternally grateful for all He has done for my kids. One fact that no one can argue with me over, is the fact that God is responsible for all the testimonies associated with my kids. I am eternally grateful for all He has done for them, and for teaching me the right thing to do – and that is to make him my kids’s Care Giver !

God Almighty knows it all, sees it all, understands it all, He is everywhere and sits on top of every other power in heaven and on earth.

What all these translate to is that no matter the arrangement you make for the upbringing and care for your children, my advice to you is to ALWAYS INVOLVE GOD………by praying for them and handing them over to God….ALWAYS !!!

Do you have a child(ren) ? If you do, in whose care do you entrust them every day?

Thanks for your time.

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